...No better you than the you that you are...

I want to speak to my programmer I have words for them.

Did I mention my tire pressure system alerted last night? So I went out there this morning and all FOUR tires are low. The back ones are minor. the front two are horribly low. Fan-fucking-tastic. I struggled to wake up this morning as is and I don't need this. I call Rio Tire, they're so slammed they can't work me in. That leaves Wal-Mart. They're doing reno so it might take 1-3 hours. But what choice is there?


I get up there and while they're working I try to talk to the pharmacy but they can't run my insurance to see the cost of the dex coms without the prescription so that's no help (meanwhile I can't call cleveland clinic or edwards health or any of the other calls I need to make) Another guy comes in while I'm writing (I came prepared. I was not prepared for plastic grade school chairs and nothing else in the waiting room) and he has been here for FOUR hours while these people try to put on tires. They couldn't even remove his lugnuts. He had to do it himself.

I was going to take my car back at 2:30 after 2 hours of sitting there and give Rio Tire a try anyhow as a walk in and I can walk to my office there and get some work done. But they took my car in and in less than a half hour it's done. 'We replaced all four tire stems.' that seems impossible. I make them repeat it. They charge me 19 bucks...there's no way they did ANYTHING.

Talked to Dad. He looked it up. The stems (with the tire pressure stuff) are 45$ a piece. So you put in four new ones plus labor for 19? Who are we fucking kidding. You put air in my tires and blew some up my ass. If the tires aren't flat again tomorrow I'll drive up to autozone for fix a flat and shove that in. I just need it to last to get home to Costco as these are under warranty.

I don't get home til almost 5 pm. I got nothing done other than the writing. Only to find I wrote the open call's submission dates down wrong (or they closed early). Sigh. Well I have another open call this would fit but it pays much less.

And let's get on to the Fannish 50

Vivziepop has confirmed Valentino will be the spotlight Vee in S3 of Hazbin. I am not surprised by this at all. I just hope Arackniss is in this season (I know he has a voice actor but could be S4 but since the theme of S3 is family I have high hopes) I keep hoping that she's going to announce that they got more episodes like Helluva Boss is. Speaking of which another HB short is out tomorrow.

And here are the Friday Fannish 50 fandom recs

Lines of Data - 50 Sentences of Vox Hazbin Hotel

Blood Ties Hazbin Hotel

stars Hazbin Hotel

Whiskers Hazbin Hotel

using a word he hadn't uttered in over ten years Hazbin Hotel

Stumbling Into Something FAKE

Unending Hazbin Hotel

Learn To Piece My Parts Together The Amazing Digital Circus

creatures hiding in the dark Hazbin Hotel

Swimming Lessons Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins & Final Fantasy XII

To Breathe Easy Supernatural

the Love Songs of the Urban Borahae Bird
방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS

Navigational Skills Bergerac

Always Follow The Recipe Bergerac

Professional Courtesy Bergerac

New Friend, Old Friend, Best Friend The Professionals/due South

Your Princess is in Another Castle Hazbin Hotel

Siren's Song Hazbin Hotel

Ageless Eyes Torchwood

Hazbin Academy Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss

Cuteness Aggression Hazbin Hotel

Concealer Hazbin Hotel

Threatened Hazbin Hotel

The Aftershow The Amazing Digital Circus

Searching for Guidance The Sentinel/Numb3rs

Gently in the Darkness Inspector George Gently

then I'm ready for October. If I wanted Florida, I would have stayed in Florida. I do not like Florida type weather (okay it's tolerable in Jan/Feb) Ugh. This is why I'm thinking the SW to Snowbird to when I'm older.

Today feels like I accomplished nothing. I cleaned the computer room more. Dropped the task chair on my big toe and made it bleed. Cut the base of my left thumb open on god knows what. Cleaning sucks.

Got rejected from one vampire open call. Plan to look this one over and send it to the new vampire one. It's historic and I think that is really a hard sell in a lot of places.

What I Just Finished Reading:

Our Sisters Keeper - a very weird own voices black magic setting in the 1920s, has some serious creepy vibes

Frieren: Beyond Journey's End vol 1 - A lot of my friends love th is so I did buy vol 2 even though I was kinda bored with this. It's a neat idea. Frieren is an elf so she is going to way outlive her adventuring partners and she is trying to find a way to connect...I guess. I dunno. I didn't much like her so...


Sleeping on Paper Boats (Kami no Fune de Nemuru) I just happened to get drawn in by the cover and for a second I was going to pass because as much as I love queer fic I am NOT a a BL fan and this is BL based on the manga line SuBLime manga. Ha. My problem with BL is how hard SO much of it leans into the ABO omegaverse stuff. I dislike ABO, hard. Also as someone who has had it happen more than once with a NO being heard as a yes I find that shit triggering.

That said this was really interesting to me. It's horror/romance and I am looking forward to getting the next volume.


What I am Currently Reading:


The Death Card - currently struggling to get into it


Cloak and Dagger Club - a post WWI mystery that I'm enjoying so far




What I Plan to Read Next: some of my looming arcs and things for popsugar

Cleaning does that to me. I did get part of my computer room cleaned, not entirely but it's under control now and that makes me happy. I have three bags of books that need to go for donation. I had taken them to work but no one wanted this batch. In the process I found the missing parts of my cosplay. I didn't find my damn camera. Really?

Called the Cleveland Clinic and my estimation of them has fallen greatly (well not of the doctors there but god the staff) the call triage people leave so much to be desired. They claim they only called me on the 4th. Dudes, I called you back FIVE times in May. And how can the call center NOT know the damn phone number for the gastroenterologist department. All I want to know is do I need new testing before I come up there (I'm betting yes, already been looking for a doctor. Can't find any)

Called my insurance because I'm locked out of my web page. They get me back in so I can use the chat to ask my question about dexcom (I love that because I then copy and paste ALL of it to keep it to use against them later) They said call CVS and here's a number if they still get the 'there's no authorization' for it and it is a 20$ copay. I call CVS they're not blocked this time but it's 150$ that's 75$ a piece not 20. I tell them not to fill it and tomorrow I have to call all the by mail places UHC gave me because I can't tell what the prices will be. I'm so over all this shit and this fucked up insurance. (Seriously those on my list who aren't American, I know several countries are talking about going from state supported to privatization like America has. Fight as hard as you can. This is a nightmare)

Sent pictures to my landlord of my broke ass porch. No one has responded.


I did do something fun. Adagio offered me a free tin with my picture on it (Yes sadly AI generated) I took the free one, ordered a big tin of it (since it was an earl grey blend and I love it) I paid for the two little sample tins. I know it's silly. I know I shouldn't because it's AI generated. But it's going to be rough birthday and I wanted something fun. (so rough apparently I'm crying just thinking about it).

And now on to the fannish 50 portion of this post


As a reminder I'm using Buffy the Vampire Slayer for this set of questions

Day 6: Least favourite male character. This one is easy. I didn't want to use a one off. And yes sometimes it's Xander but he's more of an annoyance than anything. I know a lot of fans would have put Riley here but I had no issues at all with Riley at first (he was annoying later).

No, it's Andrew Well that I absolutely hated. Yes Warren (and sadly Jonathan who had been a decent side character) were part of it but those two didn't become a recurring thing. Andrew Wells in no particular order, begs and pleads to get a shot at raping Warren's ex, wants to help to turn Buffy into a sex slave, kills Jonathan, tries to kill Dawn and Xander.

And then suddenly he's a fucking Scoobie. He gets into the fringes of the friend group. He ends up a spokesperson for Buffy and Giles and the Watchers. He gets to mock Spike and Angel twice.

This show wanted me to cheer for a would be rapist/murderer.

Worse, fans DID! Because he was funny. Do you want to know how many times I heard that excuse in the heyday of Buffyverse? I wrote a lot of Connor fanfic. I thought this character had (wasted) potential. People gave me shit about writing Connor fanfic. Often the same people would write Andrew in a good way (versus the scum bag he is) and while I'm usually a live and let live fan, write whatever you want but if you come at me and your excuse for a rapist as YOUR character is that 'he's funny and Connor isn't' just don't engage with me about this.

You can tell I had a lot of anger about it. Shockingly I still do. Maybe more than I realized. I didn't even like Spike on Angel so much (though it was better than I expected it to be) but I had nothing but pity for them after dealing with Andrew. And all the other characters dropped a notch (even my well loved Giles) for letting Andrew in. I believe in second chances but I also believe in atonement of which Andrew did nothing



( all questions under here )

So pretty soon I have to dig into the dev edits for my 1980s monster hunting story and thought that is also the perfect time to start writing the synopsis. I'll be going through this novel chapter by chapter so what better time to work on the synopsis as well. My first links will be of synopsis writing but I'm curious for my friends who have done this, how did you approach it? It's been a few years since I've even tried. I remember going chapter by chapter and summing it up in a couple of sentences per chapter.


Open Calls

Solar Punk Magazine Solarpunk Horror

Otherside Unthemed Speculative Fiction & Poetry

Tails of Terror Animal attack horror centered around pets from Rosco’s Pet Emporium

Last Girls’ Club: Fall 2026 Hive Collapse / Cascade Event

Sideshow Circus sideshow horror / carnival horrors / strange attractions

Ten Publishers Open to Direct Submissions in June 2026



From Around the web


How To Write A Novel Synopsis (With An Example)

How To Write a Book Synopsis: Complete Guide & Examples




How to Live with a Fictional Universe in Your Head

The US Horror Writer’s Guide to Quarterly Taxes and Self-Employment Income

Make Every Sentence Sing






From betty

Six Bad Arguments Against Social Justice in Speculative Fiction

Four Questions to Ask When a Character Is Clever

Six Reasons I Ask Questions As an Editor

What Is a Power Fantasy?

Should Your Tale Start With Dark Backstory?

Literary Pathways for Microtension

The Unreliable Narrator: How to Deceive Readers Without Losing Their Trust

Interiority vs. Visceral Reactions in Deep POV

Charting Your Course #3: Self-Publish Online (Part 2)

The Blueprint that Sells Books

When Deep POV Revisions Feel Flat (And What To Fix Instead)

Marketing, Algorithms, and Tropes

The Crime Fiction Evolution

How Universal Fears Pull Readers into the Story

How to Generate Better Story Ideas Using the Ones That Don’t Work

Coping Mechanism Thesaurus: Cultivating Trust.

Five Truths I Learned Editing Hundreds of Books That Might Change Your Life


8+ Ways to Signal Your Character’s Fear to Readers

Coping Mechanism Thesaurus: Visualization

How to come up with good comp titles for your book

How to research a literary agent

Tending Your Story: How Writers Build a Lasting Writing Habit

How Writers Can Handle Criticism Without Losing Confidence

Why Writers Procrastinate at the Blank Page—and How to Quiet the Mental Chaos

The First Steps to Self-Editing Your Manuscript

How Writers Can Restart Their Writing Routine After a Creative Lull

How to Write Mythic Fiction: Stop Borrowing Old Myths and Start Creating New Ones

What Makes Human Storytelling Human

Anything Is Possible.

A Draft With a Will of Its Own

So today I had tickets to see The Amazing Digital Circus's finale in the movie theater. But if I had to drive 65 miles down there twice in three days I wanted to do something else. I had decided on the art museum as I have not been there in eons (once to see some of my friend's art that was there, once with another friend) So I wanted my camera....and I can't find it.

I know it made it home. I had it on the side of the chair and I remember picking it up so I wouldn't trip on it and I swear to you that I put it on the desk top area but it's not there. Nor is it by the chair. Or in my bedroom. So where the fuck is it? All my KC pictures are still on it. Yay....


Now it's a full hour after I wanted to leave. I give up. I'll use my phone. I get all the way to the top of the road and realize oh right, my flashdrive with music isn't in the car because I took it to KC but ironically I wasn't able to use it because new cars have the itty bitty ports (eye roll, wtf for?) The flash isn't in my purse. I come back home. It's not in my lap top case (I remember putting it in either of those places leaving KC) I have another musical flashdrive on my desk next to the computer. It's not there. Nor is my box of flash drives. UGH. I take my big flash drive but it turns out unlike the newer car my 10 year old one can't figure out document folders from music folders so now I'm stuck with radio,


I knew that the art museum was not downtown but I had forgotten the country road that makes you swear you are nowhere near one of the biggest cities in WV. And I apparently forgot everything about this museum. And I never knew it had a plant conservancy too. in fact the only one IN WV (how is that possible?!?)

ticket lady - you didn't know?

Me - not until I looked it up last night. It's been a long time since I've been here.

ticket lady - must be. It's been here since the 70s

Me -(in my head) how the fuck old do you think I am?

It's not a big museum but I love that they have a section that is the art from the people who come take classes there and one whole room is juried art from the area (which my friend had been in in the past) There was a section of cool guns, a section from a local Iranian (Turkish?) doctor and his wife and then there is the large, multi-room Daywood collection. It started with a wedding gift of art but somehow ended up enough art to have a rotation collection in one full half of a small museum.

Boy that was good for a haunted object story. Imagine being able to curate a private collection donation like that? Imagine ending up haunted.

The conservancy is small. It's about two of my university's green house. They did have poison dart frogs (none visible), two axolatals in another tank, Glowstick who has the jellyfish gene and another one (no name that I saw) who was upside down on the bottom (He's not dead. He's blind). I was chased by a female turtle. They have no males and the girls are running around trying to find one.

But since this was out in the middle of a freaking woodland there was no lunch. Fine. I'll get it at the mall where the movie theater is. No, I won't because I can't find a parking place. So I get a panera bagel (in theory toasted, in reality handed to me toasted but already fucking cold) and shove it in my purse to eat in the movie theater.

You can tell I'm old. I'm nervous about sneaking in food and drink (because damn it in the 80s and 90s they checked your bag) so I have it layered and hidden at the bottom of my purse and my ticket in my pocket so I don't have to open my purse. I go in and there is no ticket person. You buy it from a kiosk but I have mine. I get in the popcorn line. I don't want it. I want the movie exclusive popcorn bucket. They don't have it so screw the popcorn. I go toward the theaters. No movie ticket taker. I can see the TADC theater but I'm like...do I just go in. I go back to the popcorn people and ask. They say just go in.

WTF? I could have just not bought a ticket and strolled in like I belonged there. How is this a system? So I go in. Now the first two days the theater was sold out. I expected mine to be sold out and I was thrilled that there was no one in my seat that I had picked out online. I sit. And...no the theater isn't sold out. Good. BUT there is a couple two seats down from me and a group of friends right behind me.

And I'm quickly reminded why I don't go to theaters. So this release was episode 8 of TADC plus the hour long finale. The idiots behind me unwrap snacks thru ALL of E8 and most of the finale. Now most of the audience has seen E8 so naturally the people behind me wait until E9 (which no one has seen) to start talking while they unwrap twizzelers and wtf else they had in god damn wrappers. And then one of them keeps sneezing and saying I hate allergies (well sweetie, right now I hate you)

THen halfway through the finale the guy next to me starts snotting and hawking and snuffling (and as we're leaving he says 'as soon as those people behind us left my nose cleared up') and if that's not that bad I look over and he's blowing his nose IN HIS SHIRT. It's too dark for me to get up and move (and there is enough people it won't be easy). I wanted to throw my tissues (in case I cried) at him but I didn't want to get any closer.

I stay to the end to get the QR code for movie exclusive TADC merch (because I can't resist merch) only to learn my purse charms have somehow slid in between the chairs and are stuck. Fan-fucking-tastic. I get it free but Husk is gone. I sit back down and feel around. He's lodged in the chair housing. I do manage to pry him out unharmed (other than the jump ring) This on top of my Kinger pin that I put on in the car and was poking me by the time I found my seat. The back is gone. I put him on the purse and nearly lose him again. OMG why?

The theater had a claw machine filled with ALL the Glitch shows plushies. I can't work a claw machine to save my soul so I gave it a pass. it was hard. I did come home (my phone can't do data right now) to open that link and bought merch I don't need but wanted. I'm kinda glad they didn't have the popcorn box. I thought it was supposed to have Jax/Kinger/Pomni on it but it was Pomni's head and you ate out of her mouth. Ew.


Took back the used lotion they sold me at Home Goods. Went for dinner at my favorite mexican place there but they gave me rice instead of elote (boo) and the black beans tasted honestly spoiled so the entire basket of chips and salsa was my sides . At least my pineapple/avocado/shrimp tacos were good. AND I beat the storm home, one so bad it was on the emergency alert.

So here are my spoiler rich movie thoughts under a cut

( so don't look under here if you plan to see the movie )

That little Jetta got almost 50 mpg but it's back with Enterprise rental.

My psychiatrist upped my meds.

Got my receipts in to the office.

And somehow that was nearly my entire day.

I did go to Jackson's color with happiness first thursday affair. It was meant to have 90 vendors. As predicted not that many showed but there were a couple blocks worth. Too much homemade bread for 15$ and little beaded things. I did find one holiday gift. I need to start writing this stuff down so I don't have a repeat of last year's overbuying. Naturally it was the hottest it's been in forever. I did get to try the x-terrestrial Taco food chuck but now I'm SO hot I can't eat. Luckily I cooled down in the car on the way home. Those birra tacos are literally better than any I've had in any restaurant around here and to the dimbulbs in front of me in line, when the dude offers you a sample, you standing there going but I don't know what it is so why would I want a sample is not helping move the line along. Get out of my way. I know what i want (it wasn't a food allergy issue, his wife was about ready to slap him into next week)


Community recs. I'm doing bad at this. I know one of my friends just started a Buffyverse kink comm but I can't remember which one...(gah I need to start writing this stuff down) so let me just mention comment_bingo is open for a new round.

Not only did I get the you're fine see you in six months go-ahead from my cancer doctor, I also lost those 10 pounds I gained and my BP was 112/57.

Now considering I ate a lot last week I'm surprised and I think there is something to what's been knocking in my head. My increasing weight and blood pressure might be related to stress and cortisol levels. This isn't something we really test for often (more when we suspect adrenal tumors) now I'm off work a couple weeks and everything is going back to normal (for me)

I wasn't going to go to the mall since I'll be back on Saturday (the theater is at the mall) but my appointment was at 1 and I was back in my car at 140. I hit the comic book store and finally walked to this Chinese restaurant I've been wanting to go to for years (no parking but I always have to park in the garage and it was a good day to walk). And....it was closed for the week. Sigh. I went to the German place instead but it's still not even 3 pm so I go to the mall to Home Goods and now I have to take something back on Saturday. The clearance body butter. I assumed that was packing tape on it. No, I got it open (which is weird because I wasn't going to open it. I don't usually need it unless the heaters are on) and someone had broken the seal and dug a finger's worth out of the cream. Yep, no thanks.

On my drive home that cardiologist I don't like called me. This is the second time his office has done this. Last time it was his NP, this time it was him, just checking in with me. It was unexpected. How are you feeling? Did you know your holter monitor study was normal (yes we already talked about this but obviously you didn't put it in your note) When will you be coming back to see me? August (unless I change that)

What I Just Finished Reading:
The Faraway Inn - a cozy fantasy (portal) set in Vermont. a really sweet YA cozy fantasy. I enjoyed it to pieces


The Gay Disaster Detective Agency - one of my arcs. I usually like Lev AC Rosen but this isn't working for me. Yeah there are better gay books out there for Pride month. Go read Rosen's Evander Mills series instead (but it is post WWII so it's not exactly happy gay stuff)


The Kindness of Strangers - another arc that wasn't for me


What I am Currently Reading:


Our Sisters Keeper - a very weird own voices black magic setting in the 1920s, has some serious creepy vibes



The Death Card - currently struggling to get into it




What I Plan to Read Next: some of my looming arcs


May's Reads - I didn't read as much as I would have liked to. But as always if you want to talk about any of them, please let's do it.


Dungeons and Danger cozy mystery

That Which Feeds Us Sapphic horror (set in Hawai'i)


Hooked on Murder cozy mystery

The Colour Out of Space Horror manga (Lovecraftian)

We Burned So Bright dystopian (with mature gay couple)


Death al Dente mystery


Lumine Volume One fantasy graphic novel

Impure Blood Volume 1 steampunk graphic novel

Evil Little Dog and I had a leisurely morning and then I took off. over 100 miles on I-64 and not a single rest stop. Not. One. Had to stop at a Pilot truck stop. Finally north of Louisville KY there was a rest stop. It was closed.

I got off the road to find food twice only to see no restaurant anywhere. Dudes if your restaurant is more than a mile off the highway DONT be on the highway sign. Finally found a rest stop just outside of Florence KY (Meaning I'm nearly in Cincinnati) and in there was a mom trying to get her daughter to take a picture talking on the pay phone. Yes you read that right, there was a living pay phone.

Finally found food in a freaking sit down Skyline chili (it's now like 330) and then I realized I'm literally 20 miles from Jungle Jim's in Cinci. I was going to stop there but I was already not getting home until 730 and I'm like are you really up to shopping (I just wanted the cheese) If I had realized I was almost there, I would have skipped Skyline and stopped there to eat.


On the negative side, I realized that my eyes were tired so I shut my left eye and things went bad. The right eye, the one that has been inflamed twice...I could barely see through it. Couldn't see the cars in front of me, not the road signs or the billboards. I mean I could see them but they were unreadable, like everything was smeared with vaseline. I thought it has gotten a little better and the eye doc said he saw nothing wrong but this was worse than I realized and when I was on 32 which has relatively few cars, I played with it more just to prove to myself this was real. Sadly it was. I have another eye doc appointment on friday. If he STILL says there is nothing wrong with my eye when it is demonstrably worse (and frankly it was when we did the eye test) I'm going to find an eye specialist because I'm not fucking around with my sight. Did that inflammation damage my cornea? Has the cataract gotten bigger? Because there is no way being unable to see anything but blurry shapes with one eye is normal. And I'm honestly scared about it.


Also my card got declined at breakfast. I figured it finally had enough. But I got a text later in the day saying I'm at my limit. I thought I had a 10K limit on this card. I'm hoping to hell they lowered the limit and didn't tell me because there is no way I spent 10K in a week.


Rocket is fine. Being here has sent my anxiety up and I hate that. There are things I need to fix because I can't have my home be a place of anxiety.


It's music monday 30 weeks of music. This week's prompt is #28 A song that makes you feel empowered

( meh, I don't really get that kind of thing from songs )





here's the whole prompt list

( All under here )

It stormed all night and I was afraid it was going to storm the whole way home. I ran down and got the egg/bacon breakfast burrito. The flour tortilla was welded to the paper but the worst of it was it was 90% potato and I don't like potato. But later I found the breakfast buffet that we saw on line but it was only on Sunday so that's why I didn't know about it and it didn't start until 9 after I already choked down that burrito. By the time I left the rain had stopped.

And off the jump the GPS says 9 north's exit is closed. Yeah, no shit, we've been going around it for the last 3 days but you never noticed it was closed then. God I regret NOT going to Union Station because from downtown to 70 E is a short trip. So my GPS tries to go around the closed road or so I think. I figured we were looping around downtown since we don't need to go there.

I couldn't have been MORE wrong. The detour added THREE hours to my 6 hour trip. I was getting ready to pull over and put the address back in for evil little dog's place only to finally see 70 East was my next turn nearly 70 miles away. so it took me nearly 200 miles out of my way. I have no idea why. It's set for either fastest route or shortest but this was neither. It took me 9 hours to get to ELD's place

So I'm too tired for a writerly ways so you get some links

Open Call

Exquisite Undead vampires


10 EXTRA Writing Calls and Opportunities for JUNE

the reckoning ecojustice

FUN IN THE DARK small town weirdness

The Book of Demons Demons, daemons, evil spirits, supernatural entities, possession, trauma, addiction, folklore, and infernal mythology

Tractor Beam: The Water Issue Water, ecosystems, agriculture, migration, drought, island ecologies, and anti-apocalyptic futures

Baneberry – A Literary Horror Annual Literary horror and psychologically rich dark fiction

Baffling Magazine June 2026 Window “Gossip” theme plus open/unthemed speculative submissions

Sley House Patreon June 2026 Window Ecopunk

58 Literary Journals that Pay their Authors



From Around the Web

The Author Who Cannot Write (About Themselves)

How Could You Do This to Me? When Characters Betray Other Characters.

Writing Away From Yourself: How to Fictionalize a Character

The Elements of Horror: Building Suspense and Tension in Your Writing

Notes from the Editor’s Desk: May 2026

Writing Stakes Without Raising the Volume


I believe Betty is traveling this weekend too so no links from here.